Anya’s Birth Story

...from Her Mom’s Point of View

I wish I could just let you all into my head and heart to share with you our daughter’s birth, because words just can’t tell the story fully. But since I can’t, I’ll do my best to tell you all about it.

Monday morning, we had an appointment at the OB for an NST at 8:15am. They weren’t completely comfortable with the way Anya was responding, because her heart rate didn’t have peaks and valleys. So, they sent us over to the hospital for an NST there. Anya wasn’t responding any differently, so the hospital called the doctor and he said that we would be inducing. I could tell that’s when Val’s stress really shot up because I knew an induction was very much not what she wanted.

We were told we would have to wait a little bit as no rooms were available in L&D, so we’d probably have to go to their triage. Luckily, a nurse walked us, as well as another pregnant woman, down. Lo and behold, there was one room left. I have a feeling they waited to see if we had “real” insurance, as the other woman was 35 weeks along (with twins?) and she was sent to triage while we went to the room.

About an hour after we got in the room, they started the pitocin (1:05pm). They started it out low, and said they would up it a bit every half hour. At 1:50, our OB came in, broke Val’s water bag, and then inserted internal monitors.

Have I mentioned that at this point two people, including the doc, thought I was Val’s mom? Doc REALLY apologized for that one!

At this point, John still wasn’t home, but he was on his way and would be there soon. Val’s best friend was waiting for her babysitter to arrive, and her fiancé was still coming in from out of town as well.

The funniest part of the day was when we had first gotten in the room and they were getting all of Val’s info (what IS the point of pre-registering???). One nurse brought in a nursing student and asked Val if it would be ok if she (the nursing student) was there. Val, quite loudly I might add, said “No!!” She was totally kidding and we were cracking up, but she scared the poor nursing student to death! She was about to back out of the room when Val assured her she was kidding. We giggled about that till labor really kicked in for Valerie.

At 3pm, Val asked for an epidural as the contractions were strong and steady. Stupid OB lied about it just seeming like a big wait for the epi as it didn’t arrive till 6pm! GRRR!!! I could tell Val was in pain and it just killed me that I couldn’t do anything and the staff wouldn’t do anything. I finally went to the nurses’ station (right outside of our room) and made a bit of a stink – give her something, anything, now!

It was just like on TV … as soon as the epi kicked in, Val was back to her old self. Unfortunately, even thought it was low, they kept having to turn off the epi because of Anya’s heart rate dips. They were fine at first as she bounced back right away, but then when they’d turn on the epi again, her heart took a bit longer to recover each time. This went on for hours, but since the staff didn’t seem concerned about the dips, I wasn’t either.

That is, of course, till the doctor covering for Val’s OB came in and said they wanted to do a c-section because Anya was in distress. This has been brought up as a possibility at 1:50pm when the doc first came in, but it was just the usual “this could happen” kind of thing. We were all surprised at the sudden turn of events and of course Val got scared to death. No warning about surgery or anything. We all questioned it, and Val questioned it yet again. They called the doc back in to explain it, and boy was she a major b*tch with her attitude – talked to Val like she was a child. She’s definitely not on our good list.

Now Val was scared, her fiancé was scared, and the rest of us just tried to be reassuring (while being worried of course about everyone). They had said that their policy was one person in the OR, but it would ultimately be up to the anesthesiologist. He said he really didn’t care how many people were in there. Can I just tell you all how amazing Valerie? She was lying there scared to death, crying, shaking, and she just kept saying over and over again that they had to let her fiancé AND me in because this was my baby and I had every right to see her born. I think she felt better when the doc said it was fine.

They gave us scrubs to put on while they took Valerie into the operating room about an hour after the decision. During that time, the contractions kept coming hard and strong, but no one checked her, despite Val saying Anya felt really low. It seemed like forever till they brought Val’s fiancé and me back to the OR, which was right next to our room. When we walked in, they already had Val opened up. They gave us our seats right away and told us not to tough anything. I could tell Val was having a rough time, even though they had said what she’d feel and it’s exactly how she felt (feeling like you can’t breathe, etc.). My seat was perfect and I could watch Val’s face and the operation.

They had a hard time getting Anya out – the doc asked one of the nurses “Was she crowning?? She’s so low!” Umm … don’t you think you should have checked before opening her up???? GRR ... don’t like that doctor at all! She finally got Anya out – the reason she wasn’t responding well to labor was because her cord was wrapped around her neck. They took her to her little bassinette and did all the stuff they do with babies. One of the docs went out of the room and brought in an incubator, so my tears of joy were also now tears of worry. As it turns out, they just needed to use a piece of equipment on it – Anya was just fine.

They finally said I could go see her and it was so amazing! I just couldn’t stop staring at her, except when I’d look over to see if Val was ok. As this point I couldn’t see her face, just the worry on her fiance’s face. Oh, and I saw the big red placenta in the doc’s hands and she did her work.

After a little bit (seemed like forever), they said I could take the baby just out of the ER and bring John to the door. Yes, there were signs all over that anyone passing the doorway had to be in scrubs, but they didn’t seem to mind. So, the proud poppa and Val’s best friend got to see Anya just minutes after she was born. Not that poppa wanted to hold her! LOL We visited for a few minutes before some other nurses noticed the lack of scrubs and had a bit of a fit. So, they put Anya in a bassinette and wheeled her into the room Val had been in previously. As they were wheeling Val to recovery, she wanted to see her, so Anya and I were escorted back again to see Val. She was a bit out of it, obviously, but she looked really good – surgery or not!

We then escorted Anya to the nursery, and then went to the cafeteria to make all of our phone calls. For those of you I was supposed to call, my apologies! I didn’t want to make calls while Val was trying to concentrate during contractions, and then I was so tired afterwards that I only called a few people. Sorry for any waiting and worrying you were doing!

Once Val was in her room, we went to see her and our time together began. Lots of pictures, lots of drugs (for Val, of course) … not much sleeping. I did spend each night with Val and Anya in their room, and took care of Anya during that time.

Anya was born Monday night at 9:06pm, weighing 5lbs 12.6oz, and was 19.25” long. Both of my girls were released yesterday afternoon (8/25), two days after Anya’s birthday, and one day after Val’s! Yes, she spent her birthday in pain and itchy in the hospital.

I have to say that being a parent doesn’t feel like I thought it would. I thought I would be overwhelmed and not know if I was coming or going. John and I both feel like “she’s finally home!” and that things are now the way they are supposed to be. It’s a peaceful, relaxing feeling. John’s taking to caring for her like a pro, though he hasn’t tackled a diaper … yet! He’s learning by watching me so I do see a diaper change for him in the very near future. LOL

Val is so incredibly amazing … what she went through to make us a family will be inspiring to me for the rest of my life. She’s bounced back like a trooper and I hope that as I write this she’s getting some much needed rest. I won’t get any more mushy because she keeps saying it’s a bad time for that. So, I’ll do that later! LOL She not only “wowed” us, but the staff at the hospital as well.

And speaking of the hospital, things went relatively well there. For the most part, they weren’t sure how to act, kept asking me if Val was allowed to see the baby, asked Val if she wanted to see the baby … but things got ironed out once we kept having the same rotation of nurses. Oh, and we did put a sign on the door that they didn’t need to tiptoe around us because we were one big family. We weren’t able to get my name on the birth certificate at the hospital because they did need the final documents from the court, which we haven’t gotten yet. But we can get a new one done as soon as we get that and we have a year to do it.

I’m sure I forgot stuff, and if I did and it’s important, I’ll let you all know! I’m obviously still a bit tired (I only slept a ½ hour the first night in the hospital) and am trying to catch up on some sleep. But, I sure don’t mind being tired from being up every 1.5-2 hours with Anya! We have our quiet moments together where I just stare at her and cry.

Thanks so much to all of you for your support, love, and good wishes through this incredible journey. We started on this path with Valerie two years ago and we’ve now started on a new and wonderful journey together.

This story written and submitted by Debbe
User name: Anyasmomma