Anya’s Birth Story
...from Her Mom’s Point of View
I wish I could just let you all into my head and
heart to share with you our daughter’s birth, because words just
can’t tell the story fully. But since I can’t, I’ll do my best
to tell you all about it.
Monday morning, we had an appointment at the OB for an NST at
8:15am. They weren’t completely comfortable with the way Anya
was responding, because her heart rate didn’t have peaks and
valleys. So, they sent us over to the hospital for an NST there.
Anya wasn’t responding any differently, so the hospital called
the doctor and he said that we would be inducing. I could tell
that’s when Val’s stress really shot up because I knew an
induction was very much not what she wanted.
We were told we would have to wait a little bit as no rooms were
available in L&D, so we’d probably have to go to their triage.
Luckily, a nurse walked us, as well as another pregnant woman,
down. Lo and behold, there was one room left. I have a feeling
they waited to see if we had “real” insurance, as the other
woman was 35 weeks along (with twins?) and she was sent to
triage while we went to the room.
About an hour after we got in the room, they started the pitocin
(1:05pm). They started it out low, and said they would up it a
bit every half hour. At 1:50, our OB came in, broke Val’s water
bag, and then inserted internal monitors.
Have I mentioned that at this point two people, including the
doc, thought I was Val’s mom? Doc REALLY apologized for that
At this point, John still wasn’t home, but he was on his way and
would be there soon. Val’s best friend was waiting for her
babysitter to arrive, and her fiancé was still coming in from
out of town as well.
The funniest part of the day was when we had first gotten in the
room and they were getting all of Val’s info (what IS the point
of pre-registering???). One nurse brought in a nursing student
and asked Val if it would be ok if she (the nursing student) was
there. Val, quite loudly I might add, said “No!!” She was
totally kidding and we were cracking up, but she scared the poor
nursing student to death! She was about to back out of the room
when Val assured her she was kidding. We giggled about that till
labor really kicked in for Valerie.
At 3pm, Val asked for an epidural as the contractions were
strong and steady. Stupid OB lied about it just seeming like a
big wait for the epi as it didn’t arrive till 6pm! GRRR!!! I
could tell Val was in pain and it just killed me that I couldn’t
do anything and the staff wouldn’t do anything. I finally went
to the nurses’ station (right outside of our room) and made a
bit of a stink – give her something, anything, now!
It was just like on TV … as soon as the epi kicked in, Val was
back to her old self. Unfortunately, even thought it was low,
they kept having to turn off the epi because of Anya’s heart
rate dips. They were fine at first as she bounced back right
away, but then when they’d turn on the epi again, her heart took
a bit longer to recover each time. This went on for hours, but
since the staff didn’t seem concerned about the dips, I wasn’t
That is, of course, till the doctor covering for Val’s OB came
in and said they wanted to do a c-section because Anya was in
distress. This has been brought up as a possibility at 1:50pm
when the doc first came in, but it was just the usual “this
could happen” kind of thing. We were all surprised at the sudden
turn of events and of course Val got scared to death. No warning
about surgery or anything. We all questioned it, and Val
questioned it yet again. They called the doc back in to explain
it, and boy was she a major b*tch with her attitude – talked to
Val like she was a child. She’s definitely not on our good list.
Now Val was scared, her fiancé was scared, and the rest of us
just tried to be reassuring (while being worried of course about
everyone). They had said that their policy was one person in the
OR, but it would ultimately be up to the anesthesiologist. He
said he really didn’t care how many people were in there. Can I
just tell you all how amazing Valerie? She was lying there
scared to death, crying, shaking, and she just kept saying over
and over again that they had to let her fiancé AND me in because
this was my baby and I had every right to see her born. I think
she felt better when the doc said it was fine.
They gave us scrubs to put on while they took Valerie into the
operating room about an hour after the decision. During that
time, the contractions kept coming hard and strong, but no one
checked her, despite Val saying Anya felt really low. It seemed
like forever till they brought Val’s fiancé and me back to the
OR, which was right next to our room. When we walked in, they
already had Val opened up. They gave us our seats right away and
told us not to tough anything. I could tell Val was having a
rough time, even though they had said what she’d feel and it’s
exactly how she felt (feeling like you can’t breathe, etc.). My
seat was perfect and I could watch Val’s face and the operation.
They had a hard time getting Anya out – the doc asked one of the
nurses “Was she crowning?? She’s so low!” Umm … don’t you think
you should have checked before opening her up???? GRR ... don’t
like that doctor at all! She finally got Anya out – the reason
she wasn’t responding well to labor was because her cord was
wrapped around her neck. They took her to her little bassinette
and did all the stuff they do with babies. One of the docs went
out of the room and brought in an incubator, so my tears of joy
were also now tears of worry. As it turns out, they just needed
to use a piece of equipment on it – Anya was just fine.
They finally said I could go see her and it was so amazing! I
just couldn’t stop staring at her, except when I’d look over to
see if Val was ok. As this point I couldn’t see her face, just
the worry on her fiance’s face. Oh, and I saw the big red
placenta in the doc’s hands and she did her work.
After a little bit (seemed like forever), they said I could take
the baby just out of the ER and bring John to the door. Yes,
there were signs all over that anyone passing the doorway had to
be in scrubs, but they didn’t seem to mind. So, the proud poppa
and Val’s best friend got to see Anya just minutes after she was
born. Not that poppa wanted to hold her! LOL We visited for a
few minutes before some other nurses noticed the lack of scrubs
and had a bit of a fit. So, they put Anya in a bassinette and
wheeled her into the room Val had been in previously. As they
were wheeling Val to recovery, she wanted to see her, so Anya
and I were escorted back again to see Val. She was a bit out of
it, obviously, but she looked really good – surgery or not!
We then escorted Anya to the nursery, and then went to the
cafeteria to make all of our phone calls. For those of you I was
supposed to call, my apologies! I didn’t want to make calls
while Val was trying to concentrate during contractions, and
then I was so tired afterwards that I only called a few people.
Sorry for any waiting and worrying you were doing!
Once Val was in her room, we went to see her and our time
together began. Lots of pictures, lots of drugs (for Val, of
course) … not much sleeping. I did spend each night with Val and
Anya in their room, and took care of Anya during that time.
Anya was born Monday night at 9:06pm, weighing 5lbs 12.6oz, and
was 19.25” long. Both of my girls were released yesterday
afternoon (8/25), two days after Anya’s birthday, and one day
after Val’s! Yes, she spent her birthday in pain and itchy in
I have to say that being a parent doesn’t feel like I thought it
would. I thought I would be overwhelmed and not know if I was
coming or going. John and I both feel like “she’s finally home!”
and that things are now the way they are supposed to be. It’s a
peaceful, relaxing feeling. John’s taking to caring for her like
a pro, though he hasn’t tackled a diaper … yet! He’s learning by
watching me so I do see a diaper change for him in the very near
Val is so incredibly amazing … what she went through to make us
a family will be inspiring to me for the rest of my life. She’s
bounced back like a trooper and I hope that as I write this
she’s getting some much needed rest. I won’t get any more mushy
because she keeps saying it’s a bad time for that. So, I’ll do
that later! LOL She not only “wowed” us, but the staff at the
hospital as well.
And speaking of the hospital, things went relatively well there.
For the most part, they weren’t sure how to act, kept asking me
if Val was allowed to see the baby, asked Val if she wanted to
see the baby … but things got ironed out once we kept having the
same rotation of nurses. Oh, and we did put a sign on the door
that they didn’t need to tiptoe around us because we were one
big family. We weren’t able to get my name on the birth
certificate at the hospital because they did need the final
documents from the court, which we haven’t gotten yet. But we
can get a new one done as soon as we get that and we have a year
to do it.
I’m sure I forgot stuff, and if I did and it’s important, I’ll
let you all know! I’m obviously still a bit tired (I only slept
a ½ hour the first night in the hospital) and am trying to catch
up on some sleep. But, I sure don’t mind being tired from being
up every 1.5-2 hours with Anya! We have our quiet moments
together where I just stare at her and cry.
Thanks so much to all of you for your support, love, and good
wishes through this incredible journey. We started on this path
with Valerie two years ago and we’ve now started on a new and
wonderful journey together.
This story written and
submitted by Debbe
User name: Anyasmomma