jax9

Mum to 9 and looking to be a surrogate

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jax9    0

Good evening,

l’m a busy Mum to 9 amazing children and over the years have often thought about how unbelievably lucky we are to have our family. I seem to grow and deliver babies well and would love to help a family get their own little person. I have contacted a couple of agencies but have been turned down because of the number of children I have. A friend who is on her second surrogacy pregnancy recommended I try this.

Can anyone help me help someone? 

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traci72    202

Unfortunately it is highly unlikely that you would be able to be approved. ASRM guidelines recommend no more than 5 pg's, and more and more RE's are following the guidelines much more closely. If your friend is an experienced surrogate, she would not advocate you trying to get around this. There are rules and guidelines in place for a reason, and having delivered 9 babies, each subsequent pg is at a MUCH higher risk, which is not what surrogacy is about. It's so wonderful that you'd love to help in this way, but surrogacy is about mitigating the risk factors and putting the IP's and any potential baby above our own desires. There are many other ways in which you can help support surrogacy that would be more beneficial to all. 

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jax9    0

Hi,

Thank you for your reply. Am I right in thinking that you have 4 of your own children and have had another 4 pregnancies as a surrogate, which resulted in 5 babies? 

Im obviously aware of the risks that come with each pregnancy, whether it is your first or your ninth. I have had no issues with my previous pregnancies and my deliveries have all been incredibly straightforward, 4 of my babies have been home births. It’s something I do well and to have the opportunity to grow a baby for someone would be amazing. 

Thank you again.

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traci72    202

Yes, you are correct. When I started in surrogacy, the ASRM guidelines were not what they are now. Over the last couple of years they have become more strict, and for good reason. In all honesty, I should NOT have done the last surrogacy that I did, but there were specific reasons why the RE approved me and why I moved forward w/it. There are rules, requirements and guidelines for very good reasons. It doesn't make a bit of difference that you're other pg's have had no issues or been straightforward. That goes for every surrogate out there or they wouldn't be approved by the RE to be a surrogate. "Doing this well" is also kind of a requirement or those women wouldn't be able to be approved. This is not about *you (general you) no matter how much someone wants to do this. This is about the IP's, their potential baby/ies, their financial/emotional/legal risks that they are taking. If you had already been a surrogate previously and this was for a sibling, then I could see you possibly being approved to carry one last time, however, that is not the case. Having delivered 9 babies already is a huge risk to expect IP's to take on and it doesn't seem like you're open to hearing that or grasping that it is incredibly unlikely for any reputable RE to approve you.

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