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When do you get the "surro" title?

#1 User is offline   JesseX2 

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Posted 17 April 2011 - 06:28 PM

I know this one may be up for debate and I'm not trying to start one--just wanted to get opinions.
(and I faintly remember another thread regarding this, but can't find it...)

At what point in a journey can you officially be titled with "surrogate"?

When you're matched?
After you transfer?
When you become pg?
After you've had the child(ren)?

Just wondering what ya'll think...

:)/>

(PS-this applies to TS's as well...wasn't quite sure where to post it, though)
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#2 User is offline   flsurromom4 

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Posted 17 April 2011 - 07:10 PM

I got chewed out on SMO for having that ("Surro") in my siggy even though I hadn't even gone to transfer yet, so the general consensus on there was once pregnant.

I think it's once matched, but everyone has an opinion lol
If you think about it, they (IP's) consider you their surrogate once you're matched, so why can't you consider yourself their surrogate on the same terms? KWIM?

JMO...
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#3 User is offline   ellemagnoliasmommy 

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Posted 17 April 2011 - 07:33 PM

Hmmm never thought about it but I felt I was a surrogate to my couple once I took the first shot in my arse! But to each her won really. I am sure you will see lots of opinions in this!
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#4 User is offline   moms4ms 

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Posted 17 April 2011 - 08:41 PM

I like to see siggy's with GS or TS and an explanation. GS~newly matched, GSx2 looking for IPs for #3, or TSx3..its nice to see the experience and also can set a "tone" with some responses on message boards. I am a GSx2 and cycling for a 3rd. Anyone who doesn't know me or is new to the board can see that I've delivered two surrogate kids and am currently doing another round. No guessing. I also did 2 TS cycles via IUI, but don't include that in my siggy as both cycles were negative.
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#5 User is offline   3j2k 

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Posted 17 April 2011 - 09:07 PM

I think Missy answered really well. There are so many stages in this process, it's good to explain where you are at that time.

I think once you're pregnant, see the h/b, and have made it "out of the woods" then maybe you're safe saying you're a GS to ___. That's JMO, of course! http://www.allaboutsurrogacy.com/forums/public/style_emoticons/default/rolling_eyes.gif

Like, with my siggies, I've only used the words "hopeful", "matched", and now "soon to be". I'm not a GS yet, but getting there!
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#6 User is offline   oneexcitedoven 

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Posted 17 April 2011 - 10:20 PM

Hmm I've never thought about it. I know once we started I just told people I was going to be a surrogate. Very good question!
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#7 User is offline   wbwatts 

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Posted 18 April 2011 - 07:36 AM

i think everyone has a different opinion on this and i think that when u match ur a surrogate but i wouldn't say finished until the baby has been born for the other couple. that would complete a GSx1.
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#8 User is offline   becky272 

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Posted 18 April 2011 - 09:02 AM

yes I have seen it put lots of ways. Me, personally I don't get offecded by someone calling herself a surro, when looking. But I think it is nice to add something to that. Gs looking GS Xa million :bitelip:/> smile. or whatever. JMO. Prob. of lil value, seeing how how feel like crap and just threw in my 2 cents. good luck
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#9 User is offline   GSinIN 

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Posted 18 April 2011 - 09:12 AM

With my first couple, my siggy said GS to D&N. With my current couple, I just have matched gs. Like a pp said- I don't want to wonder if you are a gs, a ts, a gs with experience, or an IP. I think after contracts it is safe to call yourself what you are.
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#10 User is offline   TiffanyM 

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Posted 18 April 2011 - 12:14 PM

This is a tough one, just in answering this post I've changed my mind a couple of times and had to go back and edit.

I agree with Missy as well - since the process has so many steps it's almost necessary to define what phase you are in. I'm ok with ladies using the GS/TS/IM title early in their journey but with an explanation of status. "Hopeful", "searching", "matched", "cycling" etc. are all good words to use before pregnancy. I personally am not all that comfortable with someone who hasn't achieved a pregnancy calling themselves a surrogate since that's the main goal of the process but, I also recognize there are many ladies who have invested months if not years into a journey that doesn't result in a pregnancy/delivery and IMO that deserves some kind of recognition (title). :dontknowsmilie:/> I guess I feel - and there may be situations that would change my mind - that to truly call oneself a GS you need to have at the least achieved a pregnancy - delivery isn't necessary. I think it's totally ok for someone to say, "I was a surrogate for X&Y but miscarried. Again, the explanation is a big part of the title.

Not to get all technical but I think there is a difference between saying you are a GS and using the GSx1, GSx2, GSx3 labels. I'm a GSx1 and cycling for GSx2 - but I wouldn't by any means consider myself a 2x surrogate at this point. I personally use the GSx* to describe what journey I am on (along with an explanation) - not to indicated how many surrogacies I've completed.
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#11 User is offline   CarlaGSx3 

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Posted 19 April 2011 - 06:40 AM

I don't mind if someone starting says "GS" but I don't like when someone has GS x2 or whatever when they only had matches and no deliveries...I would only "count" the actual deliveries as numbers...
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#12 User is offline   blessedmomof4 

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Posted 19 April 2011 - 09:13 AM

View PostCarlaGSx3, on 19 April 2011 - 07:40 AM, said:

I don't mind if someone starting says "GS" but I don't like when someone has GS x2 or whatever when they only had matches and no deliveries...I would only "count" the actual deliveries as numbers...


I agree 100% with Carla.

I have earned my GSX3 and I don't like it when people say they are a GSX3 because they have been matched 3 times, or had 3 transfers, etc.
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#13 User is offline   TiffanyM 

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Posted 19 April 2011 - 02:41 PM

Interesting to hear the different opinions on the titles/labels that come along with the process.
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#14 User is offline   Lilkim80 

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Posted 20 April 2011 - 03:49 PM

this topic ocmes up a lot. I think you are a surrogate when you deliver.

Now experienced in surrogacy i think differently.

i think you are experienced regardless of if the transfer takes or not.

A lot of surros have different opinions on this. Some say you are not expereinced until you deliver.
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